the life of an overly polite individual

I read about an article stating about Singaporeans being extremely ungracious and not thinking about others, but states that they are overly polite. So I will now write about the life of an overly polite person.

The life of an overly polite person

At four he threw all his various, expensive toys down, telling his mother not to buy them anymore and waste money.

At eight, he threw the food his mother made onto the floor, trying to remind everyone that his mother's cooking indeed was bad.

At twelve he copied away at his friends test script, knowing this way he would pull up the class average.

At sixteen he vandalised walls, knowing he would beautify the environment with his unique designs.

At twenty, he became a bookie, fulfiling peoples desire to gamble, and also getting monetary benefit, thinking of the best way to generate a win-win situation.

At twenty four, he reminded people they could stand by refusing to get off the bus seat.

At twenty eight, he gave employment to some aunties and uncles by littering and not clearing his table.

At thirty two, he turned to gambling himself, wanting to spend the money on his family.

At thirty six, he weaved past lanes in front of others, and encouraged them to give way and help a person before himself.

At forty, he jammed the breaks in front of the ERP just to put in his cashcard, saving the police time by not breaking the law.

At forty four, he kicked cats and poured boiling water on dogs when he lost money in gambling. How considerate that he did not take it out on humans instead.

At forty eight, he blocked entrances to trains, allowing better human traffic flow out of the other doors. (All the passengers would go out of the other doors so allowing him and the passengers behind him to go in easily)

At fifty two, he cut the 4D queue so that he could use the prize money to bring his family overseas.

At fifty six, he tried to keep the peace at the library by talking as loud as he could so others would look at him and stop talking. What self sacrifice!

At sixty, he slept on benches in the park or sofas in the library, giving a subtle reminder not to while away time and waste it.

At sixty four, he went to shopping centers without bathing , giving the impression that he was supporting a saving water campaign by PUB.

At sixty eight, he jaywalked across the road and got hit by a car, even when he bothered to make the drivers more cautious and therefore the roads more safe. He did not make it past seventy.

It was clearly understood that such a man would surely be reserved a spot in heaven, for all the good deed he had done.